


What Was Missing

by Shadowkira



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Deleted Scenes, F/F, Friendship, One-Shots, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-06-19
Updated: 2014-03-17
Packaged: 2017-12-15 12:20:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/849503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shadowkira/pseuds/Shadowkira
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A collection of one shots for Rolivia, mainly featuring either episode continuation/deleted scenes or altered scenes. Rating may vary for each individual "chapter." They will not all go along with each other and were originally written to stand alone.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**.:: A New Light ::.**

_Deleted scene from season 13, episode 1, Scorched Earth. It takes place like middle to late in the episode._

Rating T, Friendship/Hurt/Comfort

* * *

 

Olivia yawned, stretching as she leaned back in her chair. The squad room was quiet, her desk light being the only source of light given the hour.

She looked around at the empty desk through tired eyes, her resolve weakening the longer her gaze lingered away from her computer.

She had stayed late in an attempt to find any dirt possible on Roberto DiStasio, the phone calls had long since stopped and she was now milling through both files and her own paper work in an attempt to organize any leads for tomorrow.

Heaving a sigh, the brunette closed the manilla folder on her desk and slid her chair back.

She tucked her bangs behind her ear as she grabbed her sweater and phone before shutting off her light.

Using her phone as a guide, the brunette made her way back toward the cribs.

The only sound was the click of her heels echoing off of the wall, she blinked tiredly. Almost dozing off at the slow, constant sound.

Her finger's had barely brushed the metal of the knob when another sound emerged from behind the door.

It was sobbing and within seconds the detective's mind became more alert, kicking into overdrive. Her first instinct was that the sound belonged to a victim who had come into the precinct earlier and had snuck back to the secluded room. She shook her head, hand tightening around the metal as she pushed the door open.

The light from her phone flashed weakly across the room, casting shadows from the many bunks that inhabited it.

Her eyes widened as a shock of blonde peeked out from behind white covers towards the back of the room. Olivia made her way over to the bed, her hand brushing over the younger woman's shoulder.

"Amanda?" She whispered, shaking the blonde gently.

The body beneath her hand trembled slightly at the touch but the sobs immediately quieted down.

There was a small groan before a warm and clammy hand covered the brunette's from beneath the sheet. It padded several times at the foreign extremity, before Amanda's head finally turned.

She blinked against the light from the iPhone, confusion clearly written on her illuminated features.

"Olivia?" She asked, her voice groggy and rough.

The brunette nodded out of instinct, settling herself next to the blonde on what little space was available.

"Yes, what are you still doing here?" The older woman started, worry clouding her tone as she set the phone in her lap.

Amanda appreciated the darkness and she quickly wiped at her cheeks, inwardly hoping that Olivia had somehow missed the tear tracks.

"I'm uh… Not fully settled in my new place yet." She lied, trying to smooth the excess emotion from her voice as she spoke. "Figured I would just crash here tonight."

Olivia nodded but could tell there was more to the situation than the blonde was saying, she decided to try a different tactic. "Amanda, I'm not usually one to pry… But I heard crying before I came in here. Is there anything you'd like to talk about?"

Amanda's heart sank, the last thing she wanted to exhibit in front of her new esteemed colleague was weakness. "It's nothing… Really." She mumbled, almost too quickly.

Even if the brunette actually did care, she wouldn't be able to tell. Olivia's instinct was to protect, nurture and console. Those were not things Amanda wanted, she wanted the older woman's respect.

There was silence for a moment and every second of it was torture for the blonde. Her heart was racing as she laid still, barely breathing as she waited for Olivia to either respond or leave.

Her heart skipped a beat when the brunette's voice finally cut through the silence.

"Does it have to do with your transfer?" Her voice was soft, even and reassuring.

Despite all of the embarrassment and panic running rampant in her body, Amanda felt herself calm slightly at the sound.

"Yes." The word had practically slipped out passed her lips without her permission. She felt her cheeks flush at how easily she responded to Olivia's questioning. The presence of the older woman, the longer she remained close… The calmer the Southerner felt.

"Do you mind if I ask what happened?" Olivia asked, she was trying her best not to push too hard and make the blonde clam up. But now that the woman had begun to talk, she had to keep her talking.

"It's a long story…" Amanda started, it was a weak attempt at diversion.

"I've got all night." Olivia soothed, her hand twitching to stroke either the younger woman's arm or hair. But she decided against it, not wanting to scare her off or make things more uncomfortable for their shift tomorrow. If it had been a victim, someone she would never see again she would probably allow the contact.

The blonde was still quiet and had also remained extremely still, suddenly the volume of her breathing increased. A small sound bordering a whimper escaped the smaller form next to Olivia.

The brunette's eyes widened as Amanda suddenly clung to her, body wracked heavily with sobs.

Olivia's hand lifted off of the bed, hovering over the blonde's hair for a moment before stroking it soothingly.

She didn't know what had happened to the younger woman to make her so vulnerable, she could tell that Amanda had been fighting down the urge to do exactly what she was doing in that moment.

Her earlier resentment for the blonde was fading away fast, she had been afraid of her presence. A younger woman could easily show her up around the precinct, especially with Elliot being gone. Olivia knew she was already too distracted with Elliot's job to worry too heavily on her own… Aside from the victims and cases of course.

She had even felt herself beginning to doubt their victim in their current case, her own emotional distress beginning to cloud her judgement.

Amanda had been the opposite, eager and excited to work and fight for the victim.

Her current emotional state no were visible beneath whatever mask she had built up to conceal it.

The gentle hand and occasional calm sound from Olivia finally calmed Amanda's sobs. She continued to stroke the blonde's hair until her breathing evened out to a slow and steady rhythm that indicated she had fallen back to sleep.

Olivia glanced down toward where she knew Amanda's face was, a smile pulling at her lips as she put off rising from the bed.

Although it might sound horrible, Olivia felt relieved she'd seen this side of the blonde. It made her seem more real, more human to her. The reasons for disliking her now seemed petty and borderline unrealistic.

It wasn't Amanda's fault that Elliot was debating turning in his papers, it wasn't Amanda's fault that she was younger and more athletic. She respected and looked up to the senior detective and she had made it a point to make that obvious from the first moment they had met.

Tomorrow, it would be Olivia's turn. To make sure that this moment brought them closer, rather than forcing them back apart.

Her eyes and smile softened, her fingers moving over the blonde's hair one last time before she moved one cot over. Her phone illuminating the room slightly, giving her one last look toward her sleeping colleague before the light faded and then finally disappeared.


	2. Contagious

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After Amanda's argument in her apartment with Jeff and Kim, she asks Olivia to meet her at a bar. Continuation of Friending Emily.
> 
> Rating T, Friendship/Comfort/Romance

Amanda sat her beer down on the bar, her jaw flexing as her nails teased the wood grain below her fingertips.

"Hey, you alright?" Olivia asked, sitting her jacket down on the bar as she took up the stool next to the blonde.

"Yeah, fine." She chewed on the inside of her cheek for a moment before looking back up, watching a moment as Olivia ordered a drink.

"Sorry to call you out here... I know you said you were beat."

"It's okay, did something happen?"

"Came home to Kim and her... Abusive ex boyfriend on my couch. Guess he flew in while we we're workin' on wrappin' up our case today."

"I'm guessing he didn't take kindly to you asking him to leave?" Olivia asked, frowning slightly at her colleague's tired features.

"He knows better than to show his temper around me, I got him out pretty quick..." She swallowed, purposely leaving out the part about drawing her gun on Jeff.

"It was Kim, she was pretty mad at me for makin' him leave. She stormed into my room and locked herself in there."

Olivia nodded, quickly thanking the bartender for her drink before looking back to Amanda.

"She's gettin' mad because I work but I don't know what I can do. I wasn't exactly expectin' company." She threw her hands up in frustration, "Not to mention... Anythin' I try to do right she goes and makes things twice as bad!" She slammed her right hand down on the bar, pinching the bridge of her nose with the left.

At a loss for words, Olivia reached her hand out and gently stroked Amanda's hand with her thumb.

Amanda's eyes snapped open at the contact, they moved to the connected hands before she lowered her left hand to reach for her drink. The blonde fought down the urge to frown as Olivia retracted her hand.

The two chatted for a bit, about anything that they could think of other than work and family problems.

"I'm sorry Amanda, I hate to be rude but I am exhausted." Olivia said, sitting her empty glass back on the bar.

The blonde waved her hand, "S'okay, I'm gonna head out too."

"You're not driving are you?" Olivia asked, her tone worried.

"Nah, gettin' a cab. Last one for a while... Since Kim broke into my extra cash." She mumbled, fishing around in her pocket for her wallet.

"Hey, I can give you a lift." Olivia said, the blonde paused in her attempts to pull her wallet from the confines of her jacket.

"You sure?" Amanda asked, her voice suddenly sounding much smaller.

"Yeah, no problem." Olivia said smiling wider, "I should thank you. You gave me an excuse to drive my car for once."

Amanda's eyes widened as she was led over to an older style red Mustang, despite it's age it was in great condition.

"This is yours?" She asked, eyes still wide.

Olivia smirked as she unlocked the car, "Yep, its definitely a blast to drive it around on occasion."

 

* * *

 

Olivia followed Amanda into the blonde's apartment, she had helped the younger woman up the steps. Now she wanted to make sure that Kim was the only one in the apartment, especially with Rollins drunk.

Amanda flicked on the light switch in the foyer, her eyes scanning over the kitchen and living room before making her way back to her bedroom door. She pressed her ear to the wood, gently trying to turn the knob. The door was still locked and the faint sound of Kim snoring was coming from inside.

"Right where I left her." Amanda said with a smile as she moved back to where Olivia was standing, "Thanks for bringin' me home."

Olivia shook her head, "It was no problem, let me know if you need anything-"

She was cut off as Amanda lips met her own and the blonde pushed her back gently into the wall behind her.

Olivia froze, a little shocked at the suddenness of it all. She put her hands up to stop the blonde but felt a shiver roll down her spine when Amanda's tongue slid across her bottom lip.

The taste of alcohol was heavy on the younger woman's lips and Olivia's hands hovered over the blonde's shoulders. She was still struggling with the debate to stop what was happening before it went any further.

The warmth spreading throughout her body was weakening her resolve and engulfing her senses. Finally, Olivia's hands fell slowly to stop at the younger woman's hips.

Amanda's hands gently slid across her jawline before slipping beneath her ears and into her hair and the blonde's head tilted back. Her body pressing tightly against Olivia's as she deepened the kiss.

Olivia moaned softly, head falling back as Amanda broke the kiss to begin kissing down the length of her neck.

Amanda paused, grinning into Olivia's flushed skin as the older woman's breaths came out in short pants.

"Gonna let little ole me do all the work?"

Olivia watched as Amanda pulled back when she didn't answer, the blonde's teeth were playfully biting into her bottom lip.

Not one to back down when goaded, Olivia responded almost instantly.

This time her lips found Amanda's in a more aggressive lip-lock.

Amanda moaned into the kiss, her heart skipping a beat as Olivia pushed off of the wall and forced her backwards.

The two stumbled a bit as Amanda's body met the small wheeled cabinet in the center of her kitchen, the wheels shifting as they continued their momentum until it met the counter with a loud crash.

"I guess it _is_ contagious." Amanda said when their lips finally parted, a mischievous glint in her eyes. Olivia cocked a brow at the statement but didn't plan on questioning it further.

Her hand wound around the back of Amanda's neck, their lips barely brushing when they heard the lock of Amanda's bedroom door click.

"Manda? Is that you?" Kim asked in a groggy voice, her head barely peeking around the white door.

Olivia immediately moved away from the smaller woman, her hands quickly working to smooth out her clothing and her hair.

"Yeah, it's just me Kim. Go back to bed, okay?"

The younger sister remained silent for a moment, her eyes squinting as she struggled to adjust to the light coming from the foyer.

She recognized the silhouette as the form of another woman and slowly pieced together in her foggy mind what had been going on before her interruption.

"Yeah, I think I'll do that."

Amanda ran a hand through her tousled hair, "Well, that was fun."

Olivia nodded, "Let's try my place next time."

Amanda's head snapped up in shock, she had been surprised Olivia hadn't stopped her immediately and defintely hadn't been expecting an invitation for a round two.

Her heart began to pound as the brunette turned and headed for her foyer, "See you tomorrow Rollins."


	3. Girls Night

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Continuation of Vanity's Bonfire, is set immediately after Gillian's sentencing.
> 
> Rating T, Friendship/Comfort

Amanda fell back as she and the other detectives exited the court house, her eyes were focused on Kent as he attempted to force his daughter down the steps and toward their car.

Hannah was crying, her jaw set tight as she stalked beside her father.

Amanda blinked as her shoulder bumped into someone else's, "Sorry-" Her eyes widened as she realized it was Olivia she'd bumped into, worry colored her features at the brunette's expression.

"Hey, you did the right thing." Amanda whispered, her hand gently squeezing Olivia's arm.

The brunette glanced toward her, eyes glassy. She nodded and turned her head before wiping quickly at her eyes with the back of her hand.

"Do you want to go and get a drink?" Olivia asked, her voice quiet.

"Yeah, sure." Amanda said, flashing her a genuine smile at the offer.

"You guys alright back there?" Fin asked, finally noticing the distance between the two women and himself.

"Yeah, we're going to head out for a drink. Little ladies night after shift."

Amaro chuckled, "It's about time. Have fun."

 

* * *

 

Amanda smacked her lips as the alcohol warmed the back of her throat, Olivia was quietly sipping from her own drink one stool over.

"So... What's up?" Amanda asked finally, breaking the borderline tense silence that had been lingering between them since their drinks had arrived.

The brunette blinked, looking over to the blonde quickly. She ran her right hand through her hair with a sigh before speaking quietly. "I wasn't doubting my decision earlier, it might not have been the best thing to do legally... But morally I know it was right."

Amanda leaned back slightly, her stool creaking behind her. The blonde's eyes carefully took in Olivia's expression, the stoic mask that was normally there had crumbled. The white around the brown of her eyes was tinged red from unshed tears.

The lines in her brow were evident and for once, the difference in their age was extremely apparent.

"I couldn't go without making that choice... Gillian embodies what all Mothers should be." As she finished her sentence, the older woman averted her eyes. Her hand tightened around her glass before lifting it to her lips and taking a deep gulp of the amber liquid.

Amanda remained silent, carefully watching the body language and expression of her colleague.

"I don't think my mother would have even tried to do that for me."

She could see Amanda moving to answer but continued before she could get a word in, "She resented me."

Olivia paused then, allowing her words to sink in to the younger woman next to her.

Amanda's mouth remained opened for a moment before she closed it, sealing her lips in a straight line. Her brows furrowed in confusion, thumb absently fidgeting against her glass.

She hadn't been extremely close with her mother growing up, not after she reached her teenage years anyway. But her mother had done what she could in her own way.

"Why would she resent you?" She asked finally, her voice soft.

Olivia almost hadn't caught the words, "She was raped. And opted to keep me rather than have an abortion." The brunette responded almost robotically, she hadn't shared the information with many people but it helped to remain as indifferent about it as possible.

The two women, despite having shared the trauma of being assaulted were very similar in the fact that they tended to bottle up and hide weakness. They also spent very little time together outside of the job.

Olivia intended to change that, she had been meaning to do it for a while. She hoped that sharing the information would help Amanda see that she was indeed human.

She had known from the first day she had met the blonde that the younger woman had wanted a closer bond but had been hesitant to allow herself to get close. The same went with Nick and although her walls had stayed up around him they had eventually bonded over the job.

She and Amanda didn't quite work together enough for the relationship to develop quickly, they took small steps but she had slowly noticed the blonde losing hope.

"I'm sorry…" Amanda said finally, interrupting Olivia's thoughts.

Her hand brushed against Olivia's before squeezing it gently, blue eyes lowered. They searched the wood grain for a moment before rising again, "I'm sorry your mother couldn't see how fantastic of a person you are."

Olivia wanted to break eye contact but the look in the Southerner's eyes made it difficult, after a moment she finally found the strength to look down at her drink.

The tightening in her chest slowly subsiding as she watched the ice settle as it melted. There was another gentle squeeze on her hand before the warm fingers retracted.

Olivia's eyes rose as Amanda slammed her empty glass down on the bar, the blonde then leaned in and flashed the bartender a wide grin. "Two more down here, please?"

She looked back toward the brunette, quickly noticing the older woman's arched brow. "On me."

Amanda's grin widened as she took up her new glass, "Here's to girls night!"

Olivia couldn't help but smile at Amanda's attempt to lift her mood and change the subject now that the harder part was over. She returned her colleague's grin with one of her own as their glasses clinked.


	4. Confide in Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Deleted scene for the episode Lessons Learned, happens a few hours after the end scene of the episode.
> 
> This case was tough on Olivia, and while she is happy that the victims finally got the recognition and apology they deserved from the school... It has drudged up some memories.
> 
> Rating T, Friendship/Comfort.
> 
> WARNING: Mention of rape, it is not super descriptive (definitely not more than the show.)

Amanda looked up as a knock sounded at her door, she furrowed her brows and glanced toward her watch as she rose from her small couch.

"Kim, what happened... Why are you-" The blonde's eyes widened as she pulled her door open to find Olivia, the brunette was smiling slightly.

One brow arched above the other, her smile widened as Amanda shyly stepped aside so that she could enter.

"So your sister is still staying with you?"

"Yeah, for now anyway... What are you doin' here?" The blonde asked, her voice thick with confusion. "I mean... I don't have a problem with it, it's just... You've never come knockin' on my door before." She assured, her voice shaking a little with a small laugh.

"I... I need to talk." Olivia responded, pausing at the entrance to the kitchen. Her eyes moved over what she could see of the blonde's apartment. Liking the calming affect the warm and earthy tones brought to her anxious body.

Amanda's eyes darted over her shoulder as she locked the door, "What about? Is everything alright?"

Olivia nodded, "It was just... This case, it brought back a lot of memories."

Amanda paused in her approach, her teeth worrying her lip as she watched Olivia's expression become more distant.

"Why don't you go sit down in the living room? I'll make us some tea."

The blonde offered, her hand brushing Olivia's arm to make sure she had gotten the older woman's attention.

xxx

Olivia looked up as Amanda's hand entered her line of view holding a steaming mug of tea, "So you wanted to talk?" The blonde asked softly, taking a seat next to her colleague.

Olivia nodded, her eyes glancing towards the closed door across the room. "Is Kim going to be back anytime soon?"

Amanda shook her head, "She is gone for another couple of hours, I told her if she was going to stay here she needed to contribute. She got a job at a diner and they're workin' her late tonight. That's why I was shocked to hear someone knockin', thought it was her."

Olivia nodded, "Nick and I... When we went to talk to Curt and his Survivors of Abuse group... I said something to them that got me thinking."

She looked up to meet Amanda's curious eyes, the blonde blinked but didn't lower her gaze.

 _"Keeping the abuse secret … doesn't make it go away."_ Her own words echoed in her mind, taking her away from the younger woman's living room for a moment.

"My assault happened while I was undercover at Sealview Correctional Facility," Amanda's eyes widened but she remained silent, Olivia took a deep breath before continuing.

"I tried to fight him off but he was too strong... I didn't have my gun and I almost didn't have back up."

Amanda's jaw flexed, her eyes moving down briefly to where Olivia's hands trembled against her mug.

"Fin got there just in time, he... He had almost forced himself inside my mouth."

Now it was Amanda who's hands tightened around her mug, knuckles going white at the thought of a man trying to force himself onto the brunette.

"Who was he?" She managed out, her voice deeper than usual.

"He was a correctional officer at the prison. He had repeatedly assaulted and eventually killed the mother of a victim we found unconscious in a community garden."

Amanda remained silent, her eyes trained down on her now cooling mug of tea.

A few minutes passed quietly, Olivia would occasionally sip at her tea but she made it a point to remain silent now that she had finished her

story. While she had not gone into detail, talking about it had felt liberating. And she hoped with her own admission that maybe Amanda would open up as well.

"Mine... My assault happened at our Annual Awards Banquet." Amanda started, her jaw flexing again before she continued. "Came out of the bathroom and bumped into the Deputy Chief."

Olivia watched the blonde's expression closely, it was obvious the other woman felt uncomfortable reliving the encounter but she continued anyway.

"He was drunk, the smell of alcohol comin' off of him was almost overwhelming. I tried to politely excuse myself... But he kept tryin' to start a conversation. I could tell he was gettin' frustrated with my attempts to leave so I tried again with a little more attitude and he got mad. Pinned me up against the wall and then forced me into the nearest room."

Amanda chewed on her lip, settling back further into her couch. "It was a janitor's closet, he slammed the door before shovin' me up against the storage shelf."

The brunette reached out, her fingers squeezing gently into Amanda's forearm. The blonde jumped at the initial contact but relaxed once her eyes refocused and realized it was only Olivia.

"He tore at my dress, ripped one of the straps... I started yellin' for help since I couldn't out muscle him, I guess he thought the music comin' from our banquet hall would cover the sound... But someone was out in the hallway, heading towards the men's room."

She grew quiet then, her eyes becoming unfocused again as she fell into the memory.

"Did they stop him?"

She blinked, her blue eyes rising to meet the brown ones watching her carefully. "Yeah, well in a way... Sam Reynolds, he bust open the door

and gave me the distraction I needed to get free. But he thought it was a joke. Said we had scared him half to death and let the Deputy Chief leave. I just stood there, shaking. I couldn't even talk. I tried to tell Sam what had happened... But he just kept sayin' it was a mistake, Jimmy hadn't meant it that way."

"He let him leave? After walking in on your assault?" Olivia asked, appalled. "Who was he?"

Amanda averted her eyes, licking her lips nervously. "He was my Captain."

Olivia stared at her a moment, unsure of how to respond to such a betrayal of trust.

"Did you have a rape kit done or did he think that was a joke too?" The brunette asked, her tone a little more sarcastic than she was intending for it to be.

"I did, left the banquet immediately and headed over to the hospital..." Amanda's eyes remained averted, her leg beginning to jump up and down nervously.

"They took my dress for evidence, not that it was holdin' together too well anyway... Had to call my mom to come and get me, it was kind of hard to hide from her what was goin' on given the tests and lack of dress."

Olivia nodded, "What did the tests say?"

"There was no sign of any trauma... He'd barely managed to start when Sam interrupted. But they uh, found pre-ejaculate on my underwear... He had just pulled them aside."

"So you got him?" Olivia asked, confusion clouding her features as she remembered Rollins saying that it hadn't been worth pursuing.

"The kit was never made it from the hospital to be tested... It disappeared."

Olivia's frown deepened as Amanda continued, "When I went back to work... I could tell everyone knew, no one ever looked at me the same after that. Sam even acted strange at first... But he came around after the first couple of days, up until I asked for the transfer. He was friends with Cragen, and knew how much I liked your work... So he pulled some strings to get me transferred up here."

"He didn't need to pull strings."

Amanda blinked, finally raising her eyes again to meet the brunette's. "What?"

"You're a good detective, if you would have put in for a transfer up here... Without help and Cragen had read your file, I'm sure you would have gotten it just the same."

Amanda remained silent, her eyes widened slightly. She knew that the older woman had warmed up to her over time, the longer they had worked together. But hearing those words said with such honesty still made her heart skip a beat.

The two looked up as a knock sounded at the door, Olivia watched as Amanda slipped off of the couch and quickly made her way over to the door.

"Hey, you're home early...Everything okay?" The blonde asked as her younger sister stepped passed her and into the warmth of the apartment.

"Yeah, it was just a slow night... Brought home some dinner, oh... Hello."

Olivia smiled as she approached the two, "Hello, Kim. It's good to meet you, officially."

The younger blonde nodded, smiling a little as she took Olivia's hand in a shake.

"You don't have to go if you don't want to Liv..." Amanda said, her voice gentle.

"I don't want to intrude..." Olivia started, a little surprised when Kim scoffed at the idea.

"Oh please, there's nothin' to intrude on. This one will just disappear into her room while I get my shower and then we'll probably just sit around and play Scrabble or something boring like that."

Olivia felt a grin tugging at her lips as Amanda shifted awkwardly behind her sister, shooting the smaller woman a mock glare as a blush darkened her cheeks.

"I like Scrabble." Olivia offered, her eyes dancing as Amanda's moved towards hers apologetically.


	5. Quiet Night In

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Holiday one-shot for Thanksgiving.
> 
> Special thanks to Januarylight for reading and editing part of this story, after talking to you I actually kind of figured out the plot in a way I thought would work. Hope you all agree!
> 
> Rating T, Friendship/Romance

Olivia sat back in her chair as John and Fin put on their coats to leave with Ken. The younger man was grinning from one ear to the other.

He and Alejandro had prepared a dinner for his father and invited John to come along.

A smile tugged at Olivia's own lips as she watched them leave, glad that they had found an alternative since Fin's brother had prohibited Ken from coming to his house for Thanksgiving dinner.

"Have fun you guys, don't eat too much. Wouldn't want us catching a case and you being too full to move!" She said with a wave, the men paused at the threshold leading out of the squad room.

Munch shook his head with a chuckle and Fin rolled his eyes, "Yeah, you have a good one, Olivia. You too Rollins, see you ladies later."

A few minutes passed mostly in silence, the only sounds being the click of keyboards.

Cragen emerged from his office, still putting his jacket on when he noticed the two women diligently working. "You two are still here? Why don't you get home, that paperwork can wait until we come back you know."

Amanda sighed, running her hand through her hair with a nod. Olivia also nodded and gathered her files into her hands before sliding them into their manilla folder.

"Have a good rest of your holiday ladies, I'll see you tomorrow." Cragen added with a smile before turning and heading for the elevator.

Olivia glanced toward Amanda, the blonde had continued typing and her papers were still laid out in front of her.

"I'm surprised you didn't head home to Atlanta for the holiday…" Olivia said, without thinking. She watched from the corner of her eye as the blonde's head perked up at her voice.

"Figured it would be a little pointless… Today was a perfect example, criminals don't believe in days off, so neither do I." It was bordering a defensive response, the younger woman's exhaustion clearly evident in her tone.

Olivia nodded, teasing the inside of her cheek with her teeth.

She had been sitting at home, enjoying a cup of coffee on her couch when she had received the call from Cragen.

A disgruntled father had kidnapped his children while their mother was busy loading the car with food for their family dinner. The two were in the middle of a difficult divorce and the father was most likely going to lose custody even before his stunt.

Because the man had left his cell phone on, it didn't take long for the detectives to track and apprehend him.

With the children returned to their mother and the father to be charged for kidnapping, all that was left to do was the paperwork.

Between the four of them, Amanda, Fin, John and Olivia had gotten through most of it within a few hours. Leaving plenty of time to get home to a good home cooked meal.

That is unless you were one of the two female detectives working at the 1-6. The older woman wondered if maybe the blonde still didn't feel comfortable returning to her hometown after what had happened at her old precinct.

"Is Kim still in New York?"

Amanda paused in the organizing of her paperwork, one eyebrow arching briefly above the other at the twenty questions from the brunette.

"Nah, she got bored of hangin' around my place… Said she was headed home."

Olivia nodded, a small smile tugging at her lips. "You want to stop and pick up some take out?"

Amanda looked back toward her again, her expression blank.

Olivia rubbed at the back of her neck, feeling a little awkward at the lack of response.

The blonde stared for a second longer, hoping that the blush on her cheeks wasn't too obvious.

"Aren't you sick of Chinese food?" She tried a joke as a distraction before standing and collecting her coat.

Olivia's smile widened into a full blown grin, "Never! Your place or mine?"

 

xxx

Amanda blushed, fumbling uselessly with her keys for a moment before finally sliding the right one into the lock.

"Make yourself at home! I'm just going to go change into something a little more comfortable. Do you want me to find you somethin' too?" She offered, guessing that she probably had something that would fit the curvier brunette.

"That would be wonderful." Olivia said with a chuckle, setting their food down on the coffee table before taking a seat on the couch. "This is a cute place you've got here."

Amanda's laugh drifted out passed her bedroom door, "Thanks. If I would have known that I was going to have company… I would have picked up some actual food and given you a taste of Southern style cookin'."

Olivia looked up as she removed her coat, her gaze lingering on the partially closed door. "Oh, you cook?"

Amanda grinned as she emerged from her room clutching a pair of sweats and an Atlanta Falcons tee shirt. "Yes ma'am! Learned from my grandmother, I don't hold a candle to her skill though."

Olivia shook her head with a smile as she collected the change of clothing from the blonde, "Thanks and I would love to try your food sometime. The only Southern food I've had has been here in the city."

Amanda snorted, "I'll cook for ya some time and you can compare and tell me just how Southern it was. The bathroom is back there too if you need it, to the right. Better hurry though… I'm hungry."

Olivia narrowed her eyes as she accepted the tee shirt and sweat pants from the smaller woman, "Why's that?"

"Well, if you don't hurry I may wind up eating yours too."

Olivia's brows furrowed in mock horror, "You wouldn't dare."

"Try me." Amanda countered, a smirk tugging at her lips as her fingertips brushed the top of the brown paper bag. "What did you order again? Orange chicken?"

"Do not make me hurt you, Rollins." Olivia's voice carried over her shoulder as she made her way back into the blonde's bedroom.

Amanda's sarcastic retort dried up in her throat at the sight of Olivia walking into her bedroom, hips swaying in her confident stride.

 

xxx

Olivia's eyes traced over the dimly lit room, her fingers quickly flicking on the switch as she pushed the door shut behind her.

Amanda's room continued the clean and bright theme of the rest of the apartment. Warm colors melding with light brown to give a homey, rustic feel.

She paused a moment, trying to soak in the detail of the intimate space. The bed was located in the center of the room, a small, unplugged flat screen TV hung on the wall opposite.

The sheets looked to have been hastily pulled up, possibly when the blonde had come in to change.

The tan comforter was soft beneath her fingers as she moved over next to the bed, placing the fresh clothing down for a moment.

Her eyes were drawn briefly to the younger woman's night stand, smiling as she brought the candle that had adorned it to her nose. The scent became clear almost immediately: sandalwood. One of her favorites.

Returning the candle to its spot on the night stand Olivia once again allowed her eyes to roam the room as she removed her shirt. The room seemed to fit Amanda but the only thing that left the brunette mildly confused was the absence of photographs.

There was one simple circular framed cross stitch piece hung across from the bedroom door, possibly done by Amanda's mother or grandmother.

The apartment itself seemed decorated only on the off chance Amanda had visitors, it reminded her much of her own home.

Although it showcased her taste and style, it was mostly a show. She was usually only at home to sleep or eat, spending her days elsewhere.

Deciding she had spent long enough invading Amanda's privacy, Olivia slipped into the Falcons tee shirt before unbuttoning and removing her slacks. Smiling at the fact that Amanda had managed to find her a suitable pair of sweats given their difference in height.

The blonde was quietly eating her food by the time Olivia emerged from her room, blue eyes rising shyly as the older woman made her way back over to the couch.

"You didn't eat any of mine, did you?"

"Nope." Amanda responded, her confidence returning slightly as she handed the brunette the bag containing her food.

"Good, I won't have to hurt you." Olivia added with a wink as she settled into the couch beside the younger woman.

 

xxx

The two ate in silence for a few moments, Amanda already halfway through her Pork Lo Mein.

Olivia let out a small chuckle as she put her beer back on the coffee table, Amanda lowered her fork. Confusion crossing her features as her eyes rose from her own food.

"What?"

"Nothing..." Olivia said, settling back into the arm rest again. Her smile widening as she stabbed a piece of chicken with her fork, "It's just... This is nice. I know it's not the conventional way to spend the holiday. But it is so much better than sitting at home alone before going to bed early."

Amanda unconsciously lowered her food to her lap, forgetting it for a moment as the brunette's words sunk in. She had never thought that Olivia would be sitting at home alone, much like she did when she had any free time. She had always imagined that the older woman was just secretive about her personal life, she would have never considered that Olivia didn't have one.

Although she could sometimes be grumpy and distant, Olivia was a good friend. Loyal, kind and very likeable. She seemed to get along well with everyone in the precinct. It was almost baffling that she didn't at least share the holidays with Fin or Munch given the years they had shared together on the job.

"If I had gone to Atlanta... You wouldn't have gone with Munch to have dinner with Fin, Alejandro and Ken?" Amanda asked, placing her carton on the coffee table before taking a swig from her own beer.

"No, probably not... I don't like to intrude."

Amanda blinked, "I don't think they would have viewed it as intruding Liv, Fin and Munch consider you family."

Olivia remained silent for a moment, knowing the younger woman was right. She really had no excuse, they had even invited her. She just felt like this was their moment, and despite being part of their family... Without Elliot part of the picture it felt off. She hadn't fully adjusted to the shift in her life and it would be a while before it would return to normalcy.

"What about you? What would you be doing if I hadn't asked you to get Chinese with me?" Olivia asked, Amanda's hand froze in the middle of grabbing her Egg Drop Soup from the coffee table.

"...I would be sitting at home, alone. Probably have a bowl of cereal, a beer or tea and then go to sleep." Amanda said, resigning any form of argument or lie her mind had been trying to form out of instinct.

Olivia's fingers brushed the blonde's sweat pants as she placed her hand down by her knee.

Amanda's eyes rose sheepishly, her brows furrowing as Olivia's gaze lowered. Without a word, the brunette raised her hand from Amanda's leg and brushed her thumb across the blonde's lower lip.

"You've got a little..." Her sentence dropped off when she realized Amanda wasn't paying attention to what she was saying. The blonde's eyes had widened at the contact before fluttering shut briefly, opening to a half lidded state.

A shiver rolled down Olivia's spine at the intense reaction her simple touch at gotten out of the younger woman, the expression Amanda now wore was one she knew well.

To her surprise it brought a warm fluttering sensation to her stomach, her thumb lingered a moment longer over the other woman's full bottom lip before slowly moving to retract.

Amanda caught her arm before it could return to her lap, the blonde's grip was gentle but at the same time firm. Without a word, Amanda closed the distance between the two of them.

Her lips hovering over Olivia's a moment, giving the brunette the opportunity to stop her if she so desired. She could see in Olivia's eyes that she was a little intimidated by the new development but she made no movement to stop it either. Heart pounding in her ears, Amanda leaned in slightly.

She brushed her lips tentatively against Olivia's, a smile tugging at her lips as she felt the older woman's fingers slide into her hair; bringing her closer.

Amanda sighed into the kiss, relaxing her body against Olivia's as the brunette became more confident.

The two cringed, coming apart as Olivia's phone buzzed on the coffee table. Amanda's following a few seconds later, the blonde shook her head. To their surprise, the text was not from Cragen. Instead, they both found a picture of the boys and the lovely dinner they were eating. Cragen was also smiling in the shot, under the photo was a brief message from Fin:

_"Hope you two are having a good night, feel free to drop by if you decide you want some food. My boys really outdid themselves."_

Olivia smiled, momentarily forgetting what had just happened between herself and Amanda. The blonde watched closely as the other woman began to type out her response.

 _"Beautiful photo, the food looks amazing."_ Olivia paused in her typing, noticing Amanda's disappointed expression as the younger woman moved to place her phone back on the table. The brunette didn't know exactly what had happened between the two of them yet but she knew that she liked it. Whatever _it_ was. The younger woman had always made her feel admired and respected but now she felt desired again too. Something she hadn't felt since David Haden.

Staring back at the screen of her iPhone, Olivia could feel the grin forming as she began to type again. _"Thank you again for the invite but I will have to decline. I'm just going to have a quiet night in."_

Trying to ignore the butterflies that had begun to flutter in her stomach, Olivia slid the phone onto Amanda's lap. Making sure to drag the motion out, the contact snapped Amanda out of her pouting. The blonde shot a confused glance toward the brunette before sliding her finger across the screen, bringing it back to life. She quickly read the message, unable to hide her own grin when she finished.


	6. Jealousy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Good Wife & Law and Order SVU Crossover. Someone else shows blatant interest in Olivia and Amanda is not impressed._
> 
>  
> 
> _Pairings: Amanda / Olivia, slight Olivia / Sophia, Kalinda / Sophia._
> 
>    
>  _Rating T, Friendship / Romance._

Sophia pinned Kalinda up against the wall leading back to the ladies room, "You can't ignore me forever." She said, a smile playing at her lips.

She knew Kalinda still wanted her, no matter how indifferent she was trying to act.

The darker haired woman turned her head slightly, not willing to fully expose her neck to the blonde.

"Keep telling yourself that." She responded evenly, her eyes nonchalantly moving to meet Sophia's piercing gaze.

The blonde's lips drew into a tight line and her eyes narrowed. She exhaled deeply from her nose before releasing Kalinda.

"Fine. I am going to go have a few drink with our guests." Sophia stated, her eyes adapting a cold edge to them. It wasn't a cruel expression but Kalinda could tell she'd started something that she would most definitely have to deal with as quickly as possible.

She slumped against the wall as soon as Sophia was out of view, she knew the other woman was right. There was only so long she could ignore her advances, husband or not.

As she approached the bar that the other woman had already met up at she felt a sliver of jealousy slice into her stomach.

Sophia was leaning against the bar, in between a stool she'd most likely pick as her own and the one Olivia Benson was seated at. The blonde's body was angled toward the brunette in a way that Kalinda knew very well.

She had her attention focused intently on the older woman, her body language dripping with interest.

"I hope you don't mind... I looked you up before giving your captain a call, you've got a pretty impressive resumé Miss Benson."

Olivia smiled, "Thank you, I'm glad we were able to help you with your case."

Amanda's jaw tightened as she listened to the other blonde talking to her partner, Sophia was practically staring at her like a piece of meat. And while Amanda couldn't deny she caught herself staring at the brunette frequently, she could say that she wasn't as crude as the other woman.

Her eyebrows lifted, hiding behind her bangs as Sophia's hand brushed Olivia's forearm. Her blood boiled, fingers tightening around her glass as she noticed Olivia only chuckle in response.

Fin had easily picked up on her feelings for the brunette while they were partnered up on the job, he had warned her about how defensive Olivia could be about her sexual orientation. The Olivia before her seemed perfectly at ease with the blatant flirting from the other blonde.

Amanda caught a glimpse of Kalinda approaching from the corner of her eye, her rigid shoulders relaxing slightly.

Kalinda's body language spoke volumes, it was obvious that she was also displeased with how close Sophia was to Olivia.

The two shared a brief glance before Kalinda took the seat to the right of Sophia, her hand grazing the blonde's lower back. Sophia however, barely acknowledged her presence.

As the minutes ticked by, the situation stayed the same. Amanda tucked a few stray pieces of hair back behind her ear, her hand trembling as she reached for her second shot of whiskey.

Her jaw flexed as another bout of giggles erupted next to her and she quickly took the shot before slamming the glass back onto the bar.

Her eyes moved toward the two women beside her, her blood immediately beginning to boil again.

Sophia's hand was gently squeezing Olivia's thigh, a wide smile tugging at her lips.

The taller blonde's eyes drifted over lazily to meet Amanda's, one eyebrow twitching above the other at the slamming of the shot glass.

"How 'bout you back off a little, huh?" Amanda bit out, she was glaring over Olivia's shoulder. The brunette stiffened at the lowered tone, barely catching it over the chatter around them.

It was clear Sophia had gotten the message loud and clear though, as her hand retracted slowly.

Her charming smile twisting into a smirk as she settled herself back against the bar, "I'm sorry... Is there a problem?"

Amanda ignored the fact that Olivia had turned to face her, "I think you're being a little audacious, ma'am."

Olivia shot her a confused look, her brows furrowing as she turned more to face the younger woman.

"Oh? Do you? And don't you think that your partner is capable of telling me what she _wants?_ "

Amanda stood suddenly, nearly knocking her stool over in the process. Sophia pushed off of the bar, moving to meet the shorter blonde. The two stood chest to chest, Sophia staring Amanda down confidently. The smaller woman's neck and chest were flushed, her hands clenching and unclenching as the tension thickened.

Kalinda and Olivia exchanged worried glances, the two missed Sophia leaning in a little closer. Her arms folding over her chest as she stared down her nose at Amanda, "I think someone is just jealous that she isn't who the lady wants."

Olivia gasped, jumping up from her stool as Amanda lunged at Sophia. There was a loud crack as Amanda landed a back handed blow to the taller woman's cheek, sending her staggering back a step. Sophia rubbed at her cheek, her brows high on her forehead. A surprised smirk tugged at her lips, "Feisty one, aren't you?"

Olivia stepped in between the two women, her angry eyes focused on Amanda. Kalinda moved toward the scene as well, her expression firm and displeased.

Her fingers immediately moved to Sophia's already reddening cheek, the blonde's eyes met hers. The blue eyes softened immediately as she saw the worry written all over Kalinda's face.

Olivia on the other hand grabbed Amanda by the arm, dragging her away as people murmured and looked on around them.

"What are you thinking?" She hissed, her glare shocking the blonde into a stubborn silence. "Answer me." She said, more firmly.

Amanda's eyes rose to meet hers but the shorter woman's pink lips remained drawn into a tight line.

Noticing some of the other people in the hallway were beginning to stare, Olivia once again began leading the blonde. This time, she only stopped once they were in front of the elevators.

"Where are we going?" Amanda asked finally, her voice quiet.

"To talk about this, in private. I don't need the entire hotel knowing what we're arguing about."

The two remained silent as they rode up to their floor, a woman and her daughter had already been on the way up to their own room.

Exiting the elevator quickly when it came to their floor, the two made their way down to their door. Olivia swiped their key card, twisting the handle when a small light flashed green.

Amanda made her way inside silently, feeling a lot like a scolded child. Her jaw was set, her ears, cheeks and neck flushed. Was this really happening? Was Olivia Benson about to chew her out for publicly showing jealousy like a teenage brat?

At the time she had thought she was defending her colleague's honor but as she'd mulled over what happened on the way up to their room it had dawned on her. She had been jealous, that was all. Olivia had been responding positively to the other woman's advances, she hadn't been uncomfortable in anyway. There was no reason for her to involve herself other than her own jealous motives.

Biting her lip, Amanda leaned against the wall. She stared down at her boots as she waited for Olivia to finish locking the door and remove her coat.

"Amanda." Olivia said as she approached, her voice much more gentle than before. "What was that about?"

The blonde remained silent for a moment, "She was starin' at you like a cut of meat! And you just... You just sat there and giggled about it!" The blonde snapped, her frazzled and hurt emotions getting the best of her.

Olivia clenched her jaw, frustration and a little anger returning. She took in a deep breath, exhaling slowly. "With the job... It's been a while since someone has shown interest like that." She said honestly, this time she was the one who chose to avert her eyes when Amanda finally looked up.

Amanda snorted, turning away to face the rest of their room. There was no way the beautiful brunette before her didn't have men lining up for the opportunity to make her happy. Last she had heard, Olivia had been dating David Haden. And while the two of them appeared to be over because of Haden's promotion, she had just assumed that Olivia had moved on to do her own thing.

Amanda's heart skipped a beat as Olivia broke the tense silence, "At least she is straight forward with her feelings."

"What's that supposed to mean?!" Amanda cried turning back around to face the brunette.

Her eyes widened as Olivia's lips met her own roughly, they fluttered closed as the brunette tipped her head back to deepen the kiss. Amanda trembled, her knees nearly buckling as the older woman guided them back toward one of the beds.

As soon as they'd both toppled onto the comforter, Amanda watched breathlessly as Olivia began to hastily unbutton her top. The brunette's lips moved to capture her own once more as she removed the button up and outer jacket. Amanda wiggled her arms free of the fabric, her own hands moving to unbutton Olivia's.

The two moved quickly, desperate for the feel of each others skin.

Amanda's eyes locked with Olivia's, the brunette saw an apology flash across them. But before the blonde could speak, Olivia silenced her with a slender finger.

The digit dragged across the blonde's full bottom lip before Olivia's hand descended lower. Her nails scraping gently against Amanda's tensing stomach.

She captured the moan that escaped the younger woman as their lips met again, her pulse quickening as the blonde's hips bucked up into her touch.

xxx

Sophia gave a contented sigh, her blue eyes drifting open lazily to look at the woman next to her. "I knew you missed me..." She mused, her voice barely whisper.

Kalinda's left eye opened slightly, a smile tugging at her lips. "I did." She said, her voice full of sincerity. "But I can't share you Sophia. I can't."

Sophia watched pain cross the beautiful features of the woman before her, a dull ache filling her chest at the sight. "I know. And I don't want you to."

Kalinda stiffened at this, her eyes were both open now. They were watching the blonde carefully, as if she didn't believe what she was hearing.

"How about we talk about it over a drink? I'm buying." Sophia offered, a warm smile spreading across her lips. Kalinda's heart skipped a beat and her head was nodding before it had really sunk in completely.

xxx

Amanda smiled, her hand covering Olivia's beneath the bar as they talked casually.

The blonde blinked, turning her head slightly as a glass was set down not so quietly in front of her.

She met Sophia's waiting gaze and the taller blonde flashed her a genuine smile. "On me."

Amanda rolled her eyes playfully, a small chuckle escaping her. "Thanks. And sorry about before..."

Sophia nodded, pausing as she took in the more casual clothing, relaxed expressions and subtle hand holding from the two. "Nice." She added with a wink before turning to head back down the bar to where Kalinda was waiting.

Olivia chuckled, squeezing Amanda's hand as the two settled back into their conversation.


	7. Wasting Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> My take on the Rolivia car scene from 14x4, Acceptable Loss. ;)
> 
> Rating T, Friendship/Romance

Olivia's eye opened slowly as she heard the seat next to her creaking.

The blonde huffed, throwing her jacket over the back of her seat before once again trying to get comfortable. The younger woman's expression was one of frustration as the image of it reflected off of her window.

"You okay?" Olivia asked, placing her hand gently on the blonde's thigh.

The younger woman jumped at the sudden contact, her blue eyes flashing towards Olivia. "Y-yeah, I'm fine." She responded, her voice more rough than it's already familiar deep rasp.

Olivia watched as the blonde bit her lip before looking back towards the house, her body still tense from the hand that had not moved from her thigh.

Amanda's leg gave a small jerk as the hand began to move slowly back and forth from knee to mid thigh, "You don't seem alright... We can talk about it, if you want."

Amanda wasn't sure if she was hearing her partner right, the tone the other woman was using was not one she was used to. Her eyes raised slowly to meet the ones that were watching her closely.

The blonde's breath hitched as the hand stopped its back and forth motion, slowing at about mid thigh but continuing higher.

xxx

Olivia didn't know what had come over her, she had always found the other woman attractive. The deep voice, southern drawl, blonde hair, piercing blue eyes and toned muscles were all things she found too inciting to ignore. Amanda's gender had been a deterrent originally but that had slowly begun to change with time.

And the sound of her voice, so close in the cab. With that deep husky drawl that held a new tone to it, the brunette found her body responding on its own. A heat was beginning to build in her lower stomach as her fingers inched higher, her anticipation building as she watched Amanda squirm at her touch.

Without a word, Olivia pushed back their arm rests and filled the space between them. Her lips brushing heatedly against the younger woman's, Amanda responded almost immediately. Her finger's moving into Olivia's hair as she tried to bring the brunette closer, after several minutes the two parted.

Olivia bit her lip, a small smile tugging the edges of her mouth upward as she made her way over the center console and back to the back seat. Amanda stared after her for a few seconds before following, as soon as they were comfortable they found each others lips again in the darkness.

Olivia moaned as Amanda pushed her back onto the seat, her mouth kissing and nipping at her neck.

Her hands moved over the taunt skin of the blonde's back, nails digging in slightly as Amanda sucked more roughly just below her ear.

The lips left Olivia's flushed skin as the nails dug deeper, a loud moan erupted from Amanda.

The younger woman's lips brushed her earlobe as she responded to the rougher touch.

Enjoying the reaction, Olivia drug her nails down slowly. Easing up on the pressure enough that she knew she wouldn't be drawing blood, Amanda's breath hitched a little before she released it again.

A shiver rolled down Olivia's spine as the blonde's hot breath came out in pants next to her ear.

Amanda reached out with her left hand and turned the brunette's head before recapturing her lips, tongue sneaking out to meet Olivia's.

xxx

"Hey ladies, brought you breakfast." Fin said, handing Olivia a box of donuts with a wide grin. The brunette returned it but handed the pastries over to Amanda, the two shared eye contact for a brief second as their fingers brushed.

Amaro leaned over a bit out of the back of the armored car, "Is that a hickey?" He asked Olivia, the brunette glanced up her smile disappearing quickly. A dark brow arched high into her bangs, the man chuckled nervously before going back to triple check his vest. "I guess not."


End file.
